Thursday, August 31, 2006

in this whole week, i thought thru' alot alot alot.... situations to situations, problems to problems... there just seemed to be more than it. More than what lies within things i went thru' and am going thru'... my life is like a rose full of thorns n like a winding road getting more n more narrow thru' the years... i am certainly tired... new goals? aims? resolutions? targets? striving to give my best to hit them? that's certainly not all that i want my life to be! realli thought thru' n searched my past, the life with Jesus that i was living... n i came to a conclusion that though i've grown thru' my walk wif God but it's not God's best for me.. i just truely want to be who God has created me to be, a child after His own heart.. action without faith=boasting only.. i want to be a faith-filled Child Of God!! so many things i wanna be n do for God, all my dreams n desires... i realised that all these will never come to past until n unless i desire to be the one n only true Carys that was created with His breath of life.. n i know that, no matter what rough patches i've been thru'... He understands,..He do! giving my life 100% to God n God only isn't easy but i will believe, let go n let God... i know there's no point dwelling on what i'm going thru' now... i can boldly say that, some can empatise but none except Him can truely understand... it's really heart-wrenching to live in the reality of this world, almost impossible to carry on living another day in my life... BUT i know God is love n God is hope, i will continue trudging forward no matter what it takes...because Jesus, my everything, is with me all the time n will be wif me forever in years to come... i dun wan this to hinder my sch's growth!! there will be a breakthru'! there must be more than this...

moving on...

what we could have been, 9:10 PM.