Saturday, March 31, 2007
totally in awe.
physically drained. jus slept for 4 hrs plus den went to sch the following day (fri), attended chapel, went for Handbell then chiong to Nexus for choir praise n worship rehearsel which ended around 10 plus. ate dinner-cum-supper then headed home, reached home about 12 plus. went online for a while den slept at 1 plus. woke up at 730am the next morning n went to Nexus. sang for 2 services straight.
well. sounds crappy n "lorsoh".. but the whole point is just to show that i'm super uber tired. =\ (injured in a few ways too. -.-)
<3
was rather disappointed when the invitation for those who wants to receive Christ to come down the aisle n my visitors did not move at all. thru' the persistant sharing by Shar n Meng, somehow they decided to take that step of faith to say yes to Jesus. i stood stunned for a few seconds n the next moment i was bouncing n cheeing at the top of my voice. (no wonder now having sorethroat. -.-) realli moved at how God works. that moment when i witness both Clarissa n Charmaine walking front to get prayed for was most rewarding, especially they were ppl whom i SOW-ed on for 2 yrs. i can't help giving thanks for God's faithfulness n teared in joy. (:
now, SHSS has 3 peeps. pray that they'll be retained n we tgt will multiply! believing wif all my heart, the vision of a Shss cg will come to past! AMEN! =D
listening-- Promises
physically drained. jus slept for 4 hrs plus den went to sch the following day (fri), attended chapel, went for Handbell then chiong to Nexus for choir praise n worship rehearsel which ended around 10 plus. ate dinner-cum-supper then headed home, reached home about 12 plus. went online for a while den slept at 1 plus. woke up at 730am the next morning n went to Nexus. sang for 2 services straight.
well. sounds crappy n "lorsoh".. but the whole point is just to show that i'm super uber tired. =\ (injured in a few ways too. -.-)
<3
was rather disappointed when the invitation for those who wants to receive Christ to come down the aisle n my visitors did not move at all. thru' the persistant sharing by Shar n Meng, somehow they decided to take that step of faith to say yes to Jesus. i stood stunned for a few seconds n the next moment i was bouncing n cheeing at the top of my voice. (no wonder now having sorethroat. -.-) realli moved at how God works. that moment when i witness both Clarissa n Charmaine walking front to get prayed for was most rewarding, especially they were ppl whom i SOW-ed on for 2 yrs. i can't help giving thanks for God's faithfulness n teared in joy. (:
now, SHSS has 3 peeps. pray that they'll be retained n we tgt will multiply! believing wif all my heart, the vision of a Shss cg will come to past! AMEN! =D
listening-- Promises
what we could have been, 11:48 PM.
Friday, March 30, 2007
omgosh.
saw a guy sitting down on the floor beside the hall, moaning away. a few PE teachers and the principle were standing around him. found out that he actualli broke one of his limb's bone or dislocated it or smth. u can imagine how freaked out my class was during PE lessons. while the PE teacher was blahblah-ing about some badminton theory n techniques, the injured guy 3 metres away was screaming his lung out. it was quite bad, i presume, as he couldn't move at all n the sch had to call in the ambulance n got the paramedics to bring him to the hospital. *goosebumps*
tml's A maths test.
forget it lah! crap. =\
quite upset that some ppl realli dun understand wad i'm going thru' now. but who cares about whether they understand or not? as long as God understands, nothing else matters. (:
God, bring me out of this midst of dillusion n waves of stress. i want to come out of the storm even stronger! =D
listening~ Worship You alone
it hurts to know the truth sometimes but faith will keep me moving on..
saw a guy sitting down on the floor beside the hall, moaning away. a few PE teachers and the principle were standing around him. found out that he actualli broke one of his limb's bone or dislocated it or smth. u can imagine how freaked out my class was during PE lessons. while the PE teacher was blahblah-ing about some badminton theory n techniques, the injured guy 3 metres away was screaming his lung out. it was quite bad, i presume, as he couldn't move at all n the sch had to call in the ambulance n got the paramedics to bring him to the hospital. *goosebumps*
tml's A maths test.
forget it lah! crap. =\
quite upset that some ppl realli dun understand wad i'm going thru' now. but who cares about whether they understand or not? as long as God understands, nothing else matters. (:
God, bring me out of this midst of dillusion n waves of stress. i want to come out of the storm even stronger! =D
listening~ Worship You alone
it hurts to know the truth sometimes but faith will keep me moving on..
what we could have been, 12:09 AM.
Tuesday, March 27, 2007
rahh.
teachers, can't u see i'm dying here? y give remedials for every subject? so heartless of u chers man! lol -.-
well. seriously i dun see the point on having rememdial for EVERY subject. n with so many remedials stretched over the week plus the ever-piling hw(s), who can escape from the clutches of Stress? man.. realli can't wait for SYF to be over then i can finalli step down from 3 yrs+++ of torturous cca.
give me a ray of hope to catch up.
need it realli bad. =x i've found my motivation n now i'm chiong-ing towards that direction.
all things are ony possible wif You. help me trust n rely on You for those two areas of my life. (:
listening~ First.
teachers, can't u see i'm dying here? y give remedials for every subject? so heartless of u chers man! lol -.-
well. seriously i dun see the point on having rememdial for EVERY subject. n with so many remedials stretched over the week plus the ever-piling hw(s), who can escape from the clutches of Stress? man.. realli can't wait for SYF to be over then i can finalli step down from 3 yrs+++ of torturous cca.
give me a ray of hope to catch up.
need it realli bad. =x i've found my motivation n now i'm chiong-ing towards that direction.
all things are ony possible wif You. help me trust n rely on You for those two areas of my life. (:
listening~ First.
what we could have been, 11:36 PM.
Sunday, March 25, 2007
argh.
i hate the feeling of being "un-able".
i wish i could make a difference, i wish i could jus make them smile..
maybe i'm jus not the person that God'll use to do the "job". *sigh*
123123123123123123123123123123123123123123123
i feel so burdened for another handful of people. that feeling realli ___. rahh.
till the extent that i can jus go on my knees to beg them. indeed, those discernments came to be reality n it's saddening. ppl whom i used to serve wif, ppl whom i used to share life wif jus leave God like tis.. the similarities in these cases are all bcuz of the things of the world. and i'm so boiled deep inside not bcuz of them but bcuz of their decisions to give in to those temptations n temporal pleasures. i realli love them so much that i don't want to see them heading on a path they'll regret..
they have to go back to their First Love.
i wonder how am i going to help in that way, realli. ultimately, God has His plan and i'll jus continue to pray for each individual n let God do His thing! (:
hope.
i know it's not shattered. not bcuz of my situation nor the time as a limiting factor but my level of faith counts. i dun care anymore, i jus want to make God smile. =D
For You alone are great in power, for You have set my heart on fire..
allow me to brighten ur day thru' God's wisdom n love.. drawing strength from God. (:
i hate the feeling of being "un-able".
i wish i could make a difference, i wish i could jus make them smile..
maybe i'm jus not the person that God'll use to do the "job". *sigh*
123123123123123123123123123123123123123123123
i feel so burdened for another handful of people. that feeling realli ___. rahh.
till the extent that i can jus go on my knees to beg them. indeed, those discernments came to be reality n it's saddening. ppl whom i used to serve wif, ppl whom i used to share life wif jus leave God like tis.. the similarities in these cases are all bcuz of the things of the world. and i'm so boiled deep inside not bcuz of them but bcuz of their decisions to give in to those temptations n temporal pleasures. i realli love them so much that i don't want to see them heading on a path they'll regret..
they have to go back to their First Love.
i wonder how am i going to help in that way, realli. ultimately, God has His plan and i'll jus continue to pray for each individual n let God do His thing! (:
hope.
i know it's not shattered. not bcuz of my situation nor the time as a limiting factor but my level of faith counts. i dun care anymore, i jus want to make God smile. =D
For You alone are great in power, for You have set my heart on fire..
allow me to brighten ur day thru' God's wisdom n love.. drawing strength from God. (:
what we could have been, 10:40 PM.
motivated.
thoroughly am. though the farewell was kinda she-bu-de, we know that greater things are coming our way. ahh. gonna miss those 17 grads loads! =\ tears jus kept falling when i thought of the wonderful memories we've created together n how we've sharpened n spured each other towards further growth for the past 3 yrs and at the same time, i glad for them as i believe wif all my heart that those grads will be a generation of impact n God'll use them to do even greater things as they move on to another stage of their lives.
the East meeting cum farewell was realli touching especially when we took our last Holy Communion as the East District together. i realli wan to thank God for todae's meeting as i am even more motivated to go all the way for Jesus like never before, to be the one who make the difference in my school. Renewed vision, heightened Spiritual senses, increased faith.
i come in the full armour of God. Lord, send me. (:
holy discontentment. i want to grow! roar~ =P
pain felt every step i take. Lord, thy will be done. i pray that i will be alrite. (:
thoroughly am. though the farewell was kinda she-bu-de, we know that greater things are coming our way. ahh. gonna miss those 17 grads loads! =\ tears jus kept falling when i thought of the wonderful memories we've created together n how we've sharpened n spured each other towards further growth for the past 3 yrs and at the same time, i glad for them as i believe wif all my heart that those grads will be a generation of impact n God'll use them to do even greater things as they move on to another stage of their lives.
the East meeting cum farewell was realli touching especially when we took our last Holy Communion as the East District together. i realli wan to thank God for todae's meeting as i am even more motivated to go all the way for Jesus like never before, to be the one who make the difference in my school. Renewed vision, heightened Spiritual senses, increased faith.
i come in the full armour of God. Lord, send me. (:
holy discontentment. i want to grow! roar~ =P
pain felt every step i take. Lord, thy will be done. i pray that i will be alrite. (:
what we could have been, 12:00 AM.
Saturday, March 24, 2007
realli felt like a pig.
hahas. guess i was jus too tired. =x
well, due to a late day todae whereby sch ony starts at 1015am, i took the chance and slept till 9 plus. chiong-ed home rite after chapel and took a nap till 345. (that was why i was late for cg. =x ) to prove the "felt-like-a-pig" feeling further, i slept from 9 to 10pm after coming home from dinner n stuff, hahas.
no wonder now i can't sleep. -.-
chapel.
guess God's word was realli clear thru'out today's chapel session.
and God confirmed it wif wad God used me to speak to the cg todae. (:
indeed, God delights in His true worshippers and honour those who sincerely seek and love Him with their hearts. Worship is a not jus a session when we sing our love songs to God but worship is part of everything that we do in our life.
is our worship pleasing to God todae?
i must say that acting upon our decision to stand for our faith isn't the least bit easy, however, we must never be lukewarm. shan't say much, the message is very clear i presume.
Found love beyond all reason
You gave your life, your all for me
And called me yours forever
Caught in the mercy fallout
Found hope, found life, found all I need
You’re all I need
The time has come To stand for all we believe in
So I for one I’m gonna give my praise to you
Today, today
It’s all or nothing
All the way
The praise goes out to you
Yeah all the praise goes out to you today
Today, today I live for one thing
To give you praise In everything I do
Yeah all the praise goes out to you
Cause all we are is yours
And all we’re living for is all you are
Is all that you are.
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
physically tired out.
finding it hard to focus a 100% on my studies.
well, God'll make a way. (:
stretch me and at the same time lengthen me,God! i wan to have victories after another even in this time of stress n all.
i will continue clinging on.
listening- Jesus is.
help me to listen to Your slightest whisper n sense Your faint-est heartbeat...
hahas. guess i was jus too tired. =x
well, due to a late day todae whereby sch ony starts at 1015am, i took the chance and slept till 9 plus. chiong-ed home rite after chapel and took a nap till 345. (that was why i was late for cg. =x ) to prove the "felt-like-a-pig" feeling further, i slept from 9 to 10pm after coming home from dinner n stuff, hahas.
no wonder now i can't sleep. -.-
chapel.
guess God's word was realli clear thru'out today's chapel session.
and God confirmed it wif wad God used me to speak to the cg todae. (:
indeed, God delights in His true worshippers and honour those who sincerely seek and love Him with their hearts. Worship is a not jus a session when we sing our love songs to God but worship is part of everything that we do in our life.
is our worship pleasing to God todae?
i must say that acting upon our decision to stand for our faith isn't the least bit easy, however, we must never be lukewarm. shan't say much, the message is very clear i presume.
Found love beyond all reason
You gave your life, your all for me
And called me yours forever
Caught in the mercy fallout
Found hope, found life, found all I need
You’re all I need
The time has come To stand for all we believe in
So I for one I’m gonna give my praise to you
Today, today
It’s all or nothing
All the way
The praise goes out to you
Yeah all the praise goes out to you today
Today, today I live for one thing
To give you praise In everything I do
Yeah all the praise goes out to you
Cause all we are is yours
And all we’re living for is all you are
Is all that you are.
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
physically tired out.
finding it hard to focus a 100% on my studies.
well, God'll make a way. (:
stretch me and at the same time lengthen me,God! i wan to have victories after another even in this time of stress n all.
i will continue clinging on.
listening- Jesus is.
help me to listen to Your slightest whisper n sense Your faint-est heartbeat...
what we could have been, 12:32 AM.
Thursday, March 22, 2007
Synergy.
almost died there lah. hahs. =P it's a test of survival physically, emotionally n mentally. =\ having to practice, carry heavy stuff up n down stairs n the anxiousness that comes as the time tick pass... one word to describe, torture!
yey! hahas. helped my juniors do their make-up today n the outcome was commendable. (: soo happy, sense of achievement wokays? hahs. definitely, i din turn anyone ,including myself, into a monkey. so... tested n proven : i am a make-up professional! hohos. xp .
well, made a few "boo-boo(s)" on stage but after all, it was great! (:
rahh. the pain got worse. =\
getting worser each day, dunno how long i can endure.
listening- Superhero. :)
almost died there lah. hahs. =P it's a test of survival physically, emotionally n mentally. =\ having to practice, carry heavy stuff up n down stairs n the anxiousness that comes as the time tick pass... one word to describe, torture!
yey! hahas. helped my juniors do their make-up today n the outcome was commendable. (: soo happy, sense of achievement wokays? hahs. definitely, i din turn anyone ,including myself, into a monkey. so... tested n proven : i am a make-up professional! hohos. xp .
well, made a few "boo-boo(s)" on stage but after all, it was great! (:
rahh. the pain got worse. =\
getting worser each day, dunno how long i can endure.
listening- Superhero. :)
what we could have been, 11:54 PM.
Wednesday, March 21, 2007
phew.
it's so hard to forgive someone who accused u of something u did not do n embarrassed u in front of everyone. but after some time i thought it was not worth the grudge after all. Jesus, the Son of man, came to Earth to pay the price for ALL His beloved who in turn ridiculed n even spat on Him. He, the One so Holy n blameless, bore the guilt n shame of our sins for us n He died on the cross without any complain nor bore any grudge against us, then why, should i continue to dillute myself wif such unholy anger?
i repent. i've forgiven you, cher. (:
well.
Synergy is tml! can't wait cuz can be dismissed from class so much earlier n i can skip PE lessons! wahaha. but i realli dread the making-up. argh. hah. (monkey backside. =x)
still have 12345679101112 things to do or to complete.
God, SMS! hahas. (Save-My-Soul) -.-''
when it's all about You, it's all about You Jesus..
back getting worse each day. =\ it's healing time! hohos.
it's so hard to forgive someone who accused u of something u did not do n embarrassed u in front of everyone. but after some time i thought it was not worth the grudge after all. Jesus, the Son of man, came to Earth to pay the price for ALL His beloved who in turn ridiculed n even spat on Him. He, the One so Holy n blameless, bore the guilt n shame of our sins for us n He died on the cross without any complain nor bore any grudge against us, then why, should i continue to dillute myself wif such unholy anger?
i repent. i've forgiven you, cher. (:
well.
Synergy is tml! can't wait cuz can be dismissed from class so much earlier n i can skip PE lessons! wahaha. but i realli dread the making-up. argh. hah. (monkey backside. =x)
still have 12345679101112 things to do or to complete.
God, SMS! hahas. (Save-My-Soul) -.-''
when it's all about You, it's all about You Jesus..
back getting worse each day. =\ it's healing time! hohos.
what we could have been, 10:30 PM.
raining.
hahas, kinda emo feeling now.
well, weird feeling i can't explain.. maybe it's uncertainty or maybe it's jus deep thoughts. studies occupy most of my brain space currently and it's impt to know where i'm heading towards.
what is my motivation n who is my motivator? =\
ack. another million brain cells jus died. hah. i got to believe in what He can do n not what i cannot do! faith indeed comes a long long way. with all the heavy schedules for Handbell practices n preparation for SYF, time jus seem so scare n far precious. however, i know that the greater the problem that lies in front of me is, the greater the miracle God'll perform in my life.
simply having hope and continue trusting in His power. (:
i'll live a child in awe of You..
God heal my back! In Jesus' Name, Amen! woo~
hahas, kinda emo feeling now.
well, weird feeling i can't explain.. maybe it's uncertainty or maybe it's jus deep thoughts. studies occupy most of my brain space currently and it's impt to know where i'm heading towards.
what is my motivation n who is my motivator? =\
ack. another million brain cells jus died. hah. i got to believe in what He can do n not what i cannot do! faith indeed comes a long long way. with all the heavy schedules for Handbell practices n preparation for SYF, time jus seem so scare n far precious. however, i know that the greater the problem that lies in front of me is, the greater the miracle God'll perform in my life.
simply having hope and continue trusting in His power. (:
i'll live a child in awe of You..
God heal my back! In Jesus' Name, Amen! woo~
what we could have been, 12:28 AM.
Monday, March 19, 2007
thank You.
went to another level of worshiping last nite. it was great! (:
n so was sch todae. :) hahas. though had remedial after sch n was quite brain-straining, God answered my prayer faithfully. not ony did i manage to pull thru' todae's long day in sch physically n mentally, i could concentrate n absorb so much more than usual. i was like totally "wow-ed" by God grace.
yipee~
thurs is Synergy n fri is another late day whereby we only need to report to sch by 10am. whee~ however, i know that this few days wud be taxing n physically demanding... but still wanna thank God in advance for i trust that He'll carry me thru' once again. :D
wooo~ lookin' forward to WAM nite later n pray that i'll not be too tired the nxt day! hahas. anyway.... hair pls grow faster!!! hahs. it can't be tied up n a lil' long to let down. -.- irritating. hees.
off to bathe. lalalas~ (:
went to another level of worshiping last nite. it was great! (:
n so was sch todae. :) hahas. though had remedial after sch n was quite brain-straining, God answered my prayer faithfully. not ony did i manage to pull thru' todae's long day in sch physically n mentally, i could concentrate n absorb so much more than usual. i was like totally "wow-ed" by God grace.
yipee~
thurs is Synergy n fri is another late day whereby we only need to report to sch by 10am. whee~ however, i know that this few days wud be taxing n physically demanding... but still wanna thank God in advance for i trust that He'll carry me thru' once again. :D
wooo~ lookin' forward to WAM nite later n pray that i'll not be too tired the nxt day! hahas. anyway.... hair pls grow faster!!! hahs. it can't be tied up n a lil' long to let down. -.- irritating. hees.
off to bathe. lalalas~ (:
what we could have been, 4:23 PM.
Sunday, March 18, 2007
hmm.
finalli dun hab to tie my hair to sch.. well, at least i hope so. hahs. not used to it actualli but who cares! God looks at man's heart n not their outward appearance. (:
hahs. went to stayover at grand's place ystd n we had a very interesting conversation all of a sudden over lunch this noon. somehow allows me to look back n thank God.
one of my cousin was asking her aunt to acknowledge her registration of her marriage with her fiance but my aunt strongly objected as my cousin was slightly underage. ( below 21.) then i was thinking, isn't is normal nowadays for young couples to get married before 21? then the conversation that went on made me open up my thoughts further. financial capability is an impt factor to consider before getting into marriage. since my cousin n her boyfriend are merely fresh grads, on what account are they assured that wif the lil' they earn at the start is enough to bring them thru' or even to raise a kid? now i understand my aunt's worries n why she object to their marriage at present. to me personally, i felt that if the guy n the gal truely love each other, why the hurry? time will never change true love n i'm very sure of that. =D
n yes, that i dun hab to worry cuz i'll definitely wait for a true courtship that God will bless in His timing. i am assured that no matter wad friendship might someday turn sour, wadeva relationship might be broken... the love of God will never ever change. (:
God's divine love is unexplainable yet can change a person's life 360 degrees round.
finalli dun hab to tie my hair to sch.. well, at least i hope so. hahs. not used to it actualli but who cares! God looks at man's heart n not their outward appearance. (:
hahs. went to stayover at grand's place ystd n we had a very interesting conversation all of a sudden over lunch this noon. somehow allows me to look back n thank God.
one of my cousin was asking her aunt to acknowledge her registration of her marriage with her fiance but my aunt strongly objected as my cousin was slightly underage. ( below 21.) then i was thinking, isn't is normal nowadays for young couples to get married before 21? then the conversation that went on made me open up my thoughts further. financial capability is an impt factor to consider before getting into marriage. since my cousin n her boyfriend are merely fresh grads, on what account are they assured that wif the lil' they earn at the start is enough to bring them thru' or even to raise a kid? now i understand my aunt's worries n why she object to their marriage at present. to me personally, i felt that if the guy n the gal truely love each other, why the hurry? time will never change true love n i'm very sure of that. =D
n yes, that i dun hab to worry cuz i'll definitely wait for a true courtship that God will bless in His timing. i am assured that no matter wad friendship might someday turn sour, wadeva relationship might be broken... the love of God will never ever change. (:
God's divine love is unexplainable yet can change a person's life 360 degrees round.
what we could have been, 7:39 PM.
Friday, March 16, 2007
y is my life so similar to any other script or roleplay scenes?
lols. n such things had to happen todae. i gave in, nth much to explain anymore. (:
_____________________________
indeed.
it was true. wad i was rehearsing in my mind came true n played like a movie. a dreadful one yet i felt so much lighter that i dun hab to carry that heavy burden anymore. spirit, mind n heart all set free. relieved yet _______. undescribable feeling. now, hope is what i'm moving towards. i have a clearer view thru' God's lenses n i'm gonna stick to Him like a leech all day jus to listen to Him speak. so exciting, i'm in this race for yet another more glorious reason.
__________________________
ack.
the nasty feeling of being "un-abled". the many things i wish i could do but could not. to that person who plays an impt part of my life. do u noe who u r? bet u don't. hate keeping quiet all the time in class, n now... i jus wish i could, talk. i do care okay?
none of my business? get lost? scram!
simplicity of an unspoken language of the heart. do u get it? =x
lols. n such things had to happen todae. i gave in, nth much to explain anymore. (:
_____________________________
indeed.
it was true. wad i was rehearsing in my mind came true n played like a movie. a dreadful one yet i felt so much lighter that i dun hab to carry that heavy burden anymore. spirit, mind n heart all set free. relieved yet _______. undescribable feeling. now, hope is what i'm moving towards. i have a clearer view thru' God's lenses n i'm gonna stick to Him like a leech all day jus to listen to Him speak. so exciting, i'm in this race for yet another more glorious reason.
__________________________
ack.
the nasty feeling of being "un-abled". the many things i wish i could do but could not. to that person who plays an impt part of my life. do u noe who u r? bet u don't. hate keeping quiet all the time in class, n now... i jus wish i could, talk. i do care okay?
none of my business? get lost? scram!
simplicity of an unspoken language of the heart. do u get it? =x
what we could have been, 11:27 PM.
such thing should happen jus so suddenly.
how then should i react n how should i feel. it seems like i dun even noe my emotions anymore. hmm, i should feel sad but not discouraged. that's that then.
i shall give myself till this weekend to feel discouraged n then no more looking back. (:
hmm.. coming back stronger, will she? or it's the testing of my faith again?
how then should i react n how should i feel. it seems like i dun even noe my emotions anymore. hmm, i should feel sad but not discouraged. that's that then.
i shall give myself till this weekend to feel discouraged n then no more looking back. (:
hmm.. coming back stronger, will she? or it's the testing of my faith again?
what we could have been, 12:23 PM.
Wednesday, March 14, 2007
rushed down after the wad i so called "handbell day-camp".
though it was ony 20 mins, it was thoroughly refreshing n enjoyable bcuz God was there.
i knew wad i felt was not jus a feeling, disappointed, that it was somehow true. i went not for them to see n to judge but i went bcuz God prompted n i followed His voice. still trying very hard to switch my mindset but i know God is my Shepherd who will always lead by the front, therefore, i will not be afraid to follow that personal Voice.
went thru' some strenuous training todae at handbell. stood for around 7 hrs practising for Synergy n SYF. my back realli CMI, hahas. laid on the floor whenever i could cuz the strain n sharp pain at the lower back was unbearable. urgh. n worse of all, we had to carry those bell boxes, mattresses n tables up n down three storeys bcuz choir was using our room. can die. =\
abcabcabcabcabcabcabcabcabcabcabcabcabcabcabcabcabcabcabcabc
interesting.
witness this lil' incident while i was on the train, making my way to Somerset.
a lady chided two teenagers for eating on the train while her friend beside her jus looked away in some sort of embarrassment.
i thought to myself.. the lady dun even know those teenagers why bother to warn them or even reprimand them? wad benefit will she get out of this act? why did she choose to make her stand?
though i couldn't tell her heart motive or read her mind, instead it made me reflect..
sometimes, we're positioned in a way where we have to make a stand n turning to left or right would never help. cuz this is a "faith" stand. in sync wif our walk wif God, at times, we may be like the lady's friend who jus looked away; jus want a peaceful resolution. However, how is God going to reveal His power thru' us if we are not set apart to do His work? Powerful Christian living is not about big talk n no action, i will choose to make a stand n share my faith. though in the end noone might see or affirm u accordingly, God honours it n He'll never shortchange u.
i'm fully out on tis mission to be a powerful Christ ambassador, are u wif me in this?
i dun care wad ppl will say,cuz i'm running after You!
i dun care wad they think about me it's alrite, it's alrite. i dun care wad they say about me it's alrite, they'll get it one day. (:
though it was ony 20 mins, it was thoroughly refreshing n enjoyable bcuz God was there.
i knew wad i felt was not jus a feeling, disappointed, that it was somehow true. i went not for them to see n to judge but i went bcuz God prompted n i followed His voice. still trying very hard to switch my mindset but i know God is my Shepherd who will always lead by the front, therefore, i will not be afraid to follow that personal Voice.
went thru' some strenuous training todae at handbell. stood for around 7 hrs practising for Synergy n SYF. my back realli CMI, hahas. laid on the floor whenever i could cuz the strain n sharp pain at the lower back was unbearable. urgh. n worse of all, we had to carry those bell boxes, mattresses n tables up n down three storeys bcuz choir was using our room. can die. =\
abcabcabcabcabcabcabcabcabcabcabcabcabcabcabcabcabcabcabcabc
interesting.
witness this lil' incident while i was on the train, making my way to Somerset.
a lady chided two teenagers for eating on the train while her friend beside her jus looked away in some sort of embarrassment.
i thought to myself.. the lady dun even know those teenagers why bother to warn them or even reprimand them? wad benefit will she get out of this act? why did she choose to make her stand?
though i couldn't tell her heart motive or read her mind, instead it made me reflect..
sometimes, we're positioned in a way where we have to make a stand n turning to left or right would never help. cuz this is a "faith" stand. in sync wif our walk wif God, at times, we may be like the lady's friend who jus looked away; jus want a peaceful resolution. However, how is God going to reveal His power thru' us if we are not set apart to do His work? Powerful Christian living is not about big talk n no action, i will choose to make a stand n share my faith. though in the end noone might see or affirm u accordingly, God honours it n He'll never shortchange u.
i'm fully out on tis mission to be a powerful Christ ambassador, are u wif me in this?
i dun care wad ppl will say,cuz i'm running after You!
i dun care wad they think about me it's alrite, it's alrite. i dun care wad they say about me it's alrite, they'll get it one day. (:
what we could have been, 10:32 PM.
Tuesday, March 13, 2007
why.
it's jus so different now i dun enjoy it one bit. it hasn't been anything like this b4.
so awkward, so unfamilliar.
are people realli judged by who or what they are? a rash n impulsive feeling surging in me, so unfair. i hate that culture being brought about yet i'm in no position to change it. i'm not gonna run this race for u people, i'm running this race for God. that's final.
i know it here in my heart but it goes to prove another thing.
i know this is not a joke, there must be smth more rite?
status is NOT compared to identity! rahh.
it's jus so different now i dun enjoy it one bit. it hasn't been anything like this b4.
so awkward, so unfamilliar.
are people realli judged by who or what they are? a rash n impulsive feeling surging in me, so unfair. i hate that culture being brought about yet i'm in no position to change it. i'm not gonna run this race for u people, i'm running this race for God. that's final.
i know it here in my heart but it goes to prove another thing.
i know this is not a joke, there must be smth more rite?
status is NOT compared to identity! rahh.
what we could have been, 9:42 PM.
Sunday, March 11, 2007
argh.
no mood to study todae. dunno y my eyes so dry n puffy when i woke up plus the irritating flu made me feel so tired n restless.
well.
think i better drink more water. lols. =x
hols = no hols. well-said, same sentiments here too! hahas. planned about 80% of the week le but still there may be some adjustments made here n there. not gonna waste this one week, gonna spend every second of my time wisely. uhh, crazy handbell practices. =(
man.
quite disappointed that Clarissa n Huilin did not receive Christ yesterday. thought they wud most likely did, however, i adhere to God's plan. (: now, the real challenge starts.. how to bring them from this level of faith n openess to another greater lvl where God will intervene? God guide n teach me for they're more than merely faces n friendships, they are the precious souls that You so dearly created with Your breath of life. i'm not going to give up! =D realli want to thank God at the same time for allowing me to see my new believer starburst. (: Ruiqin brought a friend, Anqi, for service ystd n she received Jesus into her life. yey! so happy. (: though Ruiqin is not under my care, i still am grateful that God actualli used me to bring her to serve Him wif me. hees.
i want to see a change. a positive one not like this..
no mood to study todae. dunno y my eyes so dry n puffy when i woke up plus the irritating flu made me feel so tired n restless.
well.
think i better drink more water. lols. =x
hols = no hols. well-said, same sentiments here too! hahas. planned about 80% of the week le but still there may be some adjustments made here n there. not gonna waste this one week, gonna spend every second of my time wisely. uhh, crazy handbell practices. =(
man.
quite disappointed that Clarissa n Huilin did not receive Christ yesterday. thought they wud most likely did, however, i adhere to God's plan. (: now, the real challenge starts.. how to bring them from this level of faith n openess to another greater lvl where God will intervene? God guide n teach me for they're more than merely faces n friendships, they are the precious souls that You so dearly created with Your breath of life. i'm not going to give up! =D realli want to thank God at the same time for allowing me to see my new believer starburst. (: Ruiqin brought a friend, Anqi, for service ystd n she received Jesus into her life. yey! so happy. (: though Ruiqin is not under my care, i still am grateful that God actualli used me to bring her to serve Him wif me. hees.
i want to see a change. a positive one not like this..
what we could have been, 7:01 PM.
well.
dad is quiting job soon due to health problems, wonder if i should go back to work part-time. =\
still believing that prayer comes a long way. (:
i beg to differ about my thoughts n feelings but still the fact disappoints me. it's no longer the same and i hate it.
i am a ____ n no other. but i dun care.
God, i wan to hear from You.
tell me n i'll agree wif You.
i'll boast in the One who is worthy..
dad is quiting job soon due to health problems, wonder if i should go back to work part-time. =\
still believing that prayer comes a long way. (:
i beg to differ about my thoughts n feelings but still the fact disappoints me. it's no longer the same and i hate it.
i am a ____ n no other. but i dun care.
God, i wan to hear from You.
tell me n i'll agree wif You.
i'll boast in the One who is worthy..
what we could have been, 12:17 PM.
Tuesday, March 06, 2007
i can't run, i can't hide.
yet of it all, i have to fight.
i know i'd be much happier going that way
but
the fact is it'll never last.
i have never regretted a single moment of my life, to follow the One by whom i was made.
in the darkness, i turn to see..
noone dear but You alone.
crying myeslf to sleep every night
but i'm glad i'm the blessed one wif You beside.
everything else may fail but it's alright.
with You carrying me, i will fight, fight, fight!
poem adapted from The Light
yet of it all, i have to fight.
i know i'd be much happier going that way
but
the fact is it'll never last.
i have never regretted a single moment of my life, to follow the One by whom i was made.
in the darkness, i turn to see..
noone dear but You alone.
crying myeslf to sleep every night
but i'm glad i'm the blessed one wif You beside.
everything else may fail but it's alright.
with You carrying me, i will fight, fight, fight!
poem adapted from The Light
_____ <3>
thank God.
God does not despise dummies like me! (:
did all that i could but it jus seemed hopeless. rahh. shall get back up on my feet n continue on wif God. but when will i do so?
good question. well, i dunno. =x
SCHOOL TML! nice one.
Jiayou!
what we could have been, 9:26 PM.
God!!!
am i realli gg to join ____ _____?
i realli dunno. filled with mixed feelings, utter confusion.
i thank You for Your assurance that has never left me nor will it ever leave me.
it seemed to be strained away again.. God reveal to me the answer to my long lost ___ feeling. so far yet so close to my heart.
tis post is for You Daddy.
only You can understand i believe. (:
listening~ Dong le by Tank.
am i realli gg to join ____ _____?
i realli dunno. filled with mixed feelings, utter confusion.
i thank You for Your assurance that has never left me nor will it ever leave me.
it seemed to be strained away again.. God reveal to me the answer to my long lost ___ feeling. so far yet so close to my heart.
tis post is for You Daddy.
only You can understand i believe. (:
listening~ Dong le by Tank.
what we could have been, 12:19 PM.
Monday, March 05, 2007
argh.
my brain is dying. jus can't seem to understand what i learn, hate that feeling.
well, almost laughed my head off when i was told that i was suppose to score an A1 for both A maths n E maths based on my potential or smth. i realli thought i was ridiculous especially when what i have been getting these 3 years plus plus are all D7 to F9 (s)... anyhow, God works miracles n who knows wad God'll do when i give my 100%?
VJ.
ahh... ish that goal very distant away? or will i make it somhow?
all in God's hand, i jus do my best n have faith.
these hands were made to praise you..
my brain is dying. jus can't seem to understand what i learn, hate that feeling.
well, almost laughed my head off when i was told that i was suppose to score an A1 for both A maths n E maths based on my potential or smth. i realli thought i was ridiculous especially when what i have been getting these 3 years plus plus are all D7 to F9 (s)... anyhow, God works miracles n who knows wad God'll do when i give my 100%?
VJ.
ahh... ish that goal very distant away? or will i make it somhow?
all in God's hand, i jus do my best n have faith.
these hands were made to praise you..
what we could have been, 10:48 PM.
Thursday, March 01, 2007
this is for YOU.
yea, shepherd.. thanks for being there for me at times when i was jus so down n out. thank you for praying wif me during shepherdings, when i came to u crying about my situation n those constant silent prayers you have alwaes kept me in.
though i know i may not be the best sheep or something, i want u to know i've alwaes kept u in my heart. at times i may seem going the wrong way, you never fail to gently n lovingly correct me of my mistakes.
it's all becuz u did not give up on me that i'm here todae... serving even stronger.
Love ya Peiqing~ <3
yea, shepherd.. thanks for being there for me at times when i was jus so down n out. thank you for praying wif me during shepherdings, when i came to u crying about my situation n those constant silent prayers you have alwaes kept me in.
though i know i may not be the best sheep or something, i want u to know i've alwaes kept u in my heart. at times i may seem going the wrong way, you never fail to gently n lovingly correct me of my mistakes.
it's all becuz u did not give up on me that i'm here todae... serving even stronger.
Love ya Peiqing~ <3
Labels: Y-HOPE SHEPHERD APPRECIATION (:
what we could have been, 10:42 PM.
